An everyday hero......real life, real strength, real courage, real story!

Last year I met a wonderful lady, an amazing mother, a wife and I know many other roles that were hidden inside her.

 

I was waiting with my son and husband in the Haematology Dept. of CMC Hospital Vellore, that was May 2014. I saw a very simple and pretty young lady, skinny, well groomed in a very simple but pefectly pinned and draped saree. She was talking in hindi(manageable)to the hemophilia coordinator n was finding difficulty in conveying things to him. I could see that she didn't know English either, so I stepped in to help her out. After that we introduced ourselves. She told me that she came all the way from North east of India for her son's treatment and had spent already a month over there. That day nothing more than that we spoke to each other as we both had our appointments n engagements and moreover I was in a different state of mind as we had gone their for our son's checkup.

We were there in the hospital for few days so we passed each other 2-3 times then I saw her with her husband and the son on wheel chair. I stopped and spoke to her asking her kids issue. I was astonished to hear that she was having 2 sons with hemophilia both aged somewhere 13 and14 years and also that they were undiagnosed till they reached CMC Hospital. They were living with no idea of what was going on with their kids. Many in my country are living in this situation. When the kids got bleeding in joints or when there was no scope to move around at all due to pain n swelling, they rested and did whatever the doctors of that place told them to do. Kids were suffering with pain most of the time. The doctors over there could not diagnose what exactly it was. Luckily, a person from their village who had come to CMC hospital for some other treatment advised them to try out here, mainly because here poor are also treated with dignity and best possible treatment is given to them even their financial burden is also been taken care of. So, they also thought to bring their suffering kids to CMC hospital. In one way, they were lucky to reach the right place because there is no other better place for hemophilia treatment in India.

 

Here after checkup and tests, both the boys were diagnosed with hemophilia. When I saw both the boys, I could easily see that knees and elbows were terribly affected. The boy on the wheel chair was in pain due to elbow bleed. She told me that he could not straighten one of his legs too due to frequent bleeds into knee joints. Both boys looked identical to me, neatly dressed, very skinny, I guess mainly because the muscle loss due to being inactive all the time. But I could see that both  mother and father were doting parents. To me, she looked as if she was soaked in strength of the entire world, a strong rock that gets weathered only with the years but not withered away by the any disaster or calamity. I found myself very weak in front of her especially as a mother. I couldn't imagine of her plight!? How nicely she was taking care of two boys despite of all the challanges? I broke down in front of her. Here I was thinking all the time and I still do......that we were having the most difficult and biggest issue of not giving the best treatment to our son even though I was very well informed about hemophilia and it's issues. I couldnt stop myself from telling her that I really admired her strength and I wished that I had 10% of that in me. Whenever I saw her, I felt she passed a very positive energy to me. She told me that the doctors were recommending for a surgery. As I knew they were new to this hemophilia world, so I gave her some infos that every parent and PWH (people with hemophilia) should know.

 

Next day we crossed each other again but she was alone. She stopped me and wanted to thank me from the bottom of her heart for the info that I gave her. It was not at all a big thing for anyone like me to know and share that info. Suddenly she bursted into tears......I couldn't accept that and it shook me. She was my 'HERO', how could she cry!? I consoled her and asked why was she crying? She told me that all this while she was holding it and when she saw me she felt like sharing her pain to a sister, that her life was really really difficult. At that moment, I realised that she too is not different from me. Only difference was that my emotions and pains are seen on my face and hers were hidden. She was worried about the surgery and how they will arrange the needful things(both finance and factors)for that and how will it go? I assured her that all will be good and hospital will also help.

We use to meet each other daily till we were there. She has made a special place in my heart. I pray for her kids too when I pray for mine.

 

December 2014, I came to know that the boy (the one who was recommended for surgery) had his knee surgery and was doing better. I found her phone number few days back so, I  called her to find how things were with them? She was very happy to hear from me and told that the boys were also good. The knee which underwent surgery had infection, so they had to go back to Vellore for another surgery but now he is doing better. Its 2 days and 2 nights travel by train for them to reach this hospital. I wish there were more hospitals like CMC in India, so that one doesn't have to travel so far to avail good treatment. They are in touch with the hemophilia society of their place where they can avail free factors. I am happy that the boys are better now, at least now they know where to reach for help.